Forgiveness is the Miracle of Healing

It was 2010. I was curious about the experience of being fully immersed in mediation. I asked, then the answer came. There is an international meditation organization with meditation centers all over the world. I looked them up and to my amazement, there was a center 40 minutes from my home. Wow, I want to try this. Ten full consecutive days in silence. I wondered what that would be like?

February 2010 was my first experience. It was a lot easier than I had expected. It was in this sitting that I learned that the mind and body are connected. What I mean by this is that all of our thoughts, experiences and sufferings are all recorded in the body. It’s as if the body is a large repository of our thoughts. 

We would sit on and off for ten hours every day. After seven days, I started to observe that while I was scanning my body for sensations, I would get these images flashing in my mind's eye. I asked the instructor if these images were related to an area of the body where I was scanning. She replied with a simple ‘Yes.’ 

The next day, I got a flash of my sister. As quickly as it came, it disappeared. There was a strong sensation in my chest that got worse as the hour went by. Interesting. Why was this happening? I had not spoken to my sister in four years. She was the one who closed the door on our family. My door was always open. This is her problem. Okay, so let me take a look at this. This pain in my chest is real and it is happening to me. The problem is not out there with her but right here with me. What can I be responsible for here? I do not know why this is happening but I began to think ‘I love you and please forgive me for anything that I may have caused you to distance yourself from me. I forgive you for doing what you needed to do and I also forgive myself for anything I did unintentionally to have created this rift between us. I love you, please forgive me.’

I was eager to ask the instructor what was happening to me, but when we returned to the meditation hall they were no longer answering questions. I was left hanging and quite disappointed. The ten days ended and off into the world I went. 

The tenth day was hardest for me. Perhaps because I was dealing with this meditation incident and just the fact of getting back into communication was so jarring that I felt a sense of overwhelm.  

Two weeks passed when one day the phone rang. The name of my sister showed up on the phone display. I answered, ‘Hello?’ She replied, ‘Hello’. I asked her why she was calling me. She answered, ‘You entered my mind and I had a thought of calling you and so I did. Usually I get tired and experience a feeling of resistance, but today it was different, so here I am.’ 

Wow! I shared with her the experience I had in meditation. Whatever happened dissolved the separation between us. It was like a healing had happened. The energetic knot that kept us apart had dissolved and our relationship picked up where it had left off. 

Marise