‘Addicted’ to Meditation for Peace

It was 2008. I was practicing one hour of meditation theory followed by one hour of meditation. I went through the motions. Focus. And the mind would wander. Bring it back. Focus. And the mind would wander. Focus. Bring it back. And the mind would wander. Over and over again. 

Be kind to yourself. Have compassion. Be patient. 

Okay, how much patience do I have? It is a never-ending story of catching myself as my mind wandered off again. I wondered, does it ever get easier? Will the mind ever sit and be still? 

One day that was not like any other, in complete awareness, my body ceased to exist. I was 100% aware of nothingness. A moment of perfection. A moment of stillness. 

Okay is this it? What am I supposed to do in this stillness? Is this where creation begins?  

There it went again. My mind that forever wants to know things. 

I was grateful for this peace I was cultivating in my life. It did not seem to make much of a difference during the process. It was in my day-to-day life where things started to feel different. 

As I developed more internal peace, whenever there was drama, upset or any irritation, I would turn to my meditation cushion. I was noticing the tides change. When I first sat in meditation, sitting was a source of irritation. Now when irritation showed up in my day, I needed to sit to allow it to pass. 

I was beginning to get ‘addicted’ to meditation for inner peace.

@MariseFoster